Friday 28 October 2016

Raising Morally-Sound Children in a Morally-Decadent Society


Growing up, I remember one day I told fellow children that an old woman who lived in one of the flats in the same compound peed on her bed at night. I don't know why I said that, it wasn't like I saw her or saw the wet matress, pure mischief I guess. One of the children I gossiped to ran and told her what I said. See beating that day! Chai!! After her own beating, I was still scared because I knew she'd tell my parents and another round of flogging would follow. When my parents came back, she came upstairs and reported me to them, another round of flogging surely followed. 

Back then, it was understood that if a child misbehaved, the nearest adult should discipline the erring child and not wait for the parents alone. It kept children in line and once they saw an elder, they'd stop whatever bad thing they were doing. Therefore, it was easier to raise children back then as there were still some semblance of morals left in the society, and fewer distractions.

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I look around the society today, with all that is going on, and I conclude that it is difficult to raise a morally-sound child in today's world. Difficult, but not impossible. From the cartoons they watch, to the children and adults they interact with, they pick up a lot of crap! Most parents frown at a stranger, teacher or even relatives disciplining their children as they believe they're the only ones that should do it. That's why you'd see a child misbehaving and just waka pass, afterall he/she is not your child and the parents will not find your attempt to discipline the child helpful in any way. Children will even see an adult and continue what they were doing, knowing you're not their mother and won't touch them. Sometimes when you report an erring child to the parents they'd laugh over it; some would even criticise you for reporting the child. 

The responsibility is still on parents. We definitely don't have it easy as our parents and grandparents did, but we must make the best of what is available to us. A woman swore that her daughter could never be in the shoes of the ex Miss Anambra that was recently caught in the middle of the whole sex tape drama and blackmail; I replied that she shouldn't brag yet because I believe the poor girl's parents believe they did their best to raise a morally sound young girl. The saying 'train up a child in the way he should go and when he grows, he will not depart from it', is still applicable today. When a child is properly trained, peer pressure and life may shake him, try to veer him off the path, but because of that strong moral foundation, he/she will surely find his/her way back to the right path.

I also have done some things which I'm not proud of, but having been raised the way I was, it was impossible for me to derail completely. I can only hope to raise my child with the same sense of morality with which my parents raised me. Our generation and those before us were raised right; what is wrong in trying to raise our children the way we were raised, despite living in different times? I feel the best values to instil in a child are love and kindness; every other value can be subsumed under these two.

E no easy sha, but we just gotta try, don't we? 

Meanwhile, I really need to add some spice to my life, work on improving my social life abeg. I find myself joining workout groups, but that shouldn't be my sole idea of fun. Anyone with interesting ideas should hit me up ASAP!

Have a fun-filled weekend.
Hugs... 

3 comments:

  1. We can only try our bests as parents. Charity they say, begins at home. Give that child sound education, great moral, yet educationally and socially un-depriving upbringing and leave the rest for God...may be throw in some street-smart common sense into that child and hope that they turn out great. Another thing is to occupy the child's mind and time with exciting activities besides homework and school, such as dancing, language or some sports classes, and encourage children to bring their friends home from time to time for one activity or the other...that way, we can know all their friends. A parent might want to do a little snooping from time to time, just to ascertain that the child isn't being misled. God help us oh!

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  2. And about ideas on fun stuff to do. I and a few female friends formed a 10 lady group. We have a WhatsApp chat platform and we agreed to meet once every month to socialize. Could be at a lounge, restaurant for dinner, bar or at a joint, etc...where we can talk, catch up,dance, gossip, basically get some relief from our kids and hubbies. And if it's one of our bdays we also meet or if one of us has an event, we fo to support or once in a while meet at a member's house to have a potluck; where each person brings something to eat or drink for us all to share, and have a relaxing time. So maybe try initiating that with some friends around you😀

    ReplyDelete
  3. And about ideas on fun stuff to do. I and a few female friends formed a 10 lady group. We have a WhatsApp chat platform and we agreed to meet once every month to socialize. Could be at a lounge, restaurant for dinner, bar or at a joint, etc...where we can talk, catch up,dance, gossip, basically get some relief from our kids and hubbies. And if it's one of our bdays we also meet or if one of us has an event, we fo to support or once in a while meet at a member's house to have a potluck; where each person brings something to eat or drink for us all to share, and have a relaxing time. So maybe try initiating that with some friends around you😀

    ReplyDelete