The Harry and Meghan in Our Homes…

Source: fox.com

The Internet has been awash with news, analysis, opinions, even rants, over the news that Prince Harry, who is the sixth in line to the throne of England, and his wife, Meghan Markle said they would be stepping back as senior members of the Britain’s Royal Family. They announced their intentions to move to Canada and split time between the two countries, as well as work towards becoming financially independent. Interesting!

Now, many opinions are divided on this, many laud Prince Harry for being a ‘man and half’ by standing by his wife whom the family as well as the British media seem not to like very much. Others feel he is being ungrateful and selfish by cutting off from the family who made him what he is today.

On whichever side of the divide you find yourself, one thing is clear, this is one issue we see every day in our homes and around us, albeit not on this level. We have brothers whose wives we do not really like for one reason or the other. We have brothers, who seem to have moved away from the family immediately they got married, and we are usually quick to accuse the wife of being the one who pulled the brother away from the family.

I know a family where the man got married and decided to  change his church denomination to his wife's church. His extended family has not forgiven the woman for “charming” their brother, according to them. Countless tales have been told of in-laws being mean to their sons’ or brothers’ wives, and of men who could not stand up for their wives in the face of harsh criticisms and oppositions from family members.

These same mean and wicked in-laws around us are also the ones hailing Prince Harry for defending his wife and ‘divorcing’ his family for her sake. He has fully “left to cleave”, as the Holy Book commanded. Bravo!

I heard of a man who would always say that his wife would not allow his children come to the village for Christmas because she did not trust his family. Whenever he was asked about the children and his wife, he would say that she refused to release them to him. You can imagine how his family members felt towards the wife, until they found out they were all lies. Uncle would actually discourage his wife and children from coming home, even painted his extended family bad. Why? Just so he would save money and have freedom to do whatever he wanted in the East.

Can you now see why you should give that sister-in-law of yours a break? Your brother might be throwing her under the bus, or your brother just really loves her and wants to protect her from your hatred. You cannot accuse him of abandoning the family, or following his wife and neglecting you people when all you do is cause fights and troubles in his home. If you treat his wife nicely and respectfully, she will want to come around, and he too.

And you man, who throw your wife under the bus in the presence of your family members so you’d look good, shame on you!

However, let us not act as if women are always innocent and the victims here. There are actually very cantankerous women who marry into a family and proceed to cause trouble and bring about division among siblings and family members. Some get married with the mindset that their husbands should completely neglect everybody else, and they proceed to show this in their utterances and deeds. Shame on you too.

Marriage, they say, is hard enough without all these pressures from families. We keep telling young woman to avoid marrying into families where they are wholly not accepted, at least. Asking to be loved might seem far-fetched, but at least, a higher number of family members should like and accept you.  

Concerning the Prince, I am worried on their behalf. They seem very much in love, but we know that sometimes love is not enough to make a marriage work. This kind of pressure is not good for them. The Prince might, after a while, start missing his family and his life in England, which will bring issues between him and his wife, then lead to resentment as he would blame her for making him leave. It is a tough position to be in- between your wife and your other family.

Do not be the type who praise the actions of Meghan and the Prince, whereas in your own family you do the exact opposite. Do not be the "meddlesome meddling meddler"; also, do not be the woman who comes into a family and starts issues and drama simply because you know your husband loves and trusts your opinion.